The Dirty 30 and forever 25

               Warning: Franki AKA the SUPER MAD COW has a potty mouth and does not sensor herself                 well you have been warned

      So the past few days I have been wrestling with myself a lot. Why ? Because holy hell I turn 30 in August, when did this happen , how did this happen, where the hell did my 20's go ???? Now this will be the last time that you will hear my age because from now on I will be forever 25, so suck on that bitches j/k , I'm an adult and I can be whatever I want to be, at least that's what I was told as a kid.  Anyway a lot of things have been running through my mind like ummmmmm this isn't what I was supposed to look like at this age and why am I still in college, why am I still just a mom and wife , and so much more. So I figured why not share my story here with everyone because "hell, I'm sure someone else out there feels the same or shares my problems, I hope - oh no maybe i'm crazy , craaaaaaaaaaap now you can see how often i talk to myself.... So I will start with that as a mom in a town that I am new too I have no friends  here and my husband works night's, sooooooooo my conversations tend to lean towards bills, kids, potty training, and Toy Story , therefore on occasion I need good stimulating conversation so I tend to talk to myself, I honestly didn't consider this a problem until I started giving long practiced speeches and I was like okay maybe your losing it, but then I started answering myself and I thought okay I've lost it but then I started having full fledged conversations with myself in which I would answer myself, argue with myself and even refuse to answer myself because I was just being stubborn. Then I figured okay maybe I'm a full fledged nut case but that's okay, now when I talk to myself I can do it here and you can see it so I am talking to you - yeah you sitting at your computer going OMG WHY AM I STILL READING THIS - so to that I quote Sheldon and BAZINGA. LOL . So now onto issue 2 I was supposed to still look like I did 10 yrs ago , I mean I expected a wrinkle or two, nothing Botox wouldn't fix and to still fit into my jeans from high school but no I had kids and stress and abusive relationships so instead I have this, an overweight fat ass who has bags under eyes and wrinkles on her forehead and bingo wings there I admitted I have flipping BINGO WINGS. OMG I was a pitcher, a catcher, a first basemen, and a home run hitter I had a tight ass, flat stomach, killer calves, well shaped arms, and an EFFING AWESOME RACK. Now I have BINGO WINGS , my rack well just call me MOOZILLA because OMG they look like cow utters MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO can someone milk me please . AGH what happened ? LIFE, well eff you life because one thing is for sure I'm getting back my ass, my tummy, and hopefully the doctor will help with the utters when that time comes and as far as the wrinkles well I'm using home remedies there and hopefully they work (Knox face mask, lemon juice, an grapeseed oil ) and as far as my weight well I'm using two Slim fast shakes a day, 2 green coffee bean pills, and myfitnesspal.. I also hike on occasion and try to get on the elliptical but the exercise part is still hard so I one day a time with that until hopefully I can run a 5k(thats the big goal) but it has to be a zombie one because ,seriously, I hated running when I was thin so when I get thin again give me a motivation to run like practicing for the inevitable zombie Apocalypse DUH.  OKAY, now next  I will take two birds one stone, I'm still just a mom and wife because I'm still in college. Well I'm starting a Masters program so technically its not the same but it is, if that makes sense LOL. Here I will start with this I don't believe in going to college and getting a degree that people think you should get, I mean I have a massive debt think 2013 Audi TT big and when I finish with my degree it will be closer to an Audi R8 , and see here is the thing you are paying for this degree and if that is the case then get full use out of that Audi R8 make sure you ride it every day and all your friends see how much you love it and enjoy your time with it and do it for you, most importantly make sure its what you want not them because again its YOUR AUDI R8 not theirs so make sure its what you want. Finally, I will keep sharing about my weight loss struggles, school struggles, and life journey and if you keep reading I am sure you will find I am blunt , honest, love a lot and sometimes to much kinda gal, and I am a hoot and a half that lacks a sensor and I have  proven to be HILARIOUS just wait and see and I will also try to remember to share my at home trials and errors with home remedies and let you know how they go . So see you on the flip side homies. YO LMAO j/k I'm not ghetto.

p.s  This is a bingo wing see that skin hanging down it flaps like a wing when you throw your hands up violently screaming BINGO I GOT A BINGO  -- also note that is not me in the picture im not that brave to share my bingo wings LMAO

*all images have been used from google and are not mine so please don't credit me as they are borrowed for their perfect match to my blog*